Imma Grown Ass Man/Woman Dude . .
We said that all the time as kids . . . “I don’t even know why I am talking to her, because I am grown, and Imma do whatever the hell I wanna do!” We never wanted to listen to our parents, because we knew they were old, and didn’t understand that things are different now . . . and yet, as we got older, and could actually make our own decisions, we still hold back from taking that final step into independence.
Why? What kind of hold do our parents have on us, that even after we move out, and don’t live in their house, and have our own jobs, do we still find ourselves saying to others, “I can’t do that, My mom would kill me!” or the even more frequent “I gotta call my mom(dad) first, and see what they say.”
Not because we can’t make the decision on our own, but because we are so used to being under someone’s jurisdiction, having to answer to someone (if we were obedient children) that it takes us longer (as African Americans, I can’t speak for our Pale Counterparts) to realize that we really are in charge of our lives.
Right now, someone that I don’t really care for is having a serious issues, because she had her heart set on leaving here, and moving away. But (from what I have gathered from the whispered conversations, becuz they don’t really like me either) at the last minute, was told that she couldn’t go. Or the money or support she was planning on did not come through. Now we all know, I am not the nicest person to people that I don’t like (see: The blog I wrote about my dream and the girl that is currently dating Tha Boy), but I am really going to try to talk to her today, and let her know that when the time has come for you to leave, even if you face oppostion at every turn, get the hell out.
The reason I am going through all this shit is because I should have left a long ass time ago. So I feel the need to help her, and others understand, that after you turn 21, in the eyes of the government, you can do whatever the hell you want. If you walk away from everything you have, and everything you could ever have, you can start over. We are fourtunate to live in a country that makes that possible, even though we have a whore of a government right now.
Walk away, start over, it will work out. Every one has to get away at sometime, and you need to make sure that you are taking care of you. Someone is always going to mad, disappointed, angry, upset, livid with you. Because like Shea Shea told me, If everyone likes you, you are doing something wrong. So what you have to do, is even though it’s gonna hurt, and it’s gonna be hard, and you are going to struggle, and suffer, at the end of it, you will have grown as a person.
This last year, moving out of my mother’s house, and finally understanding the truth behind my mother’s struggles, I have such a greater appreciation for her, and fully understand how blessed I am to have her for a mother. Even when she makes me mad, I have to remember that she wore the same skirt for 10 years, so that I could have the best.
Our parents are people too. They make mistakes, they aren’t always right, and they can’t always run your life. So, let go and let God. It will all work out in the end!
What do you think?