Have You No Couth?!?!? – Things that Pissed Me the F*ck Off in 2010

Last Year 2 years ago, I wrote a blog about all the things that had happened in 2009 that pissed me off.  For a recap click here —> http://bit.ly/fxfOnU <—– I will do the same now.  Except, there is alot more stuff that pissed me off, and I am going to try my hardest to offend at LEAST 5 people.  If I offend you, please let me know.  I like to know when I have reached my goals.  So without further ado, Here is My List of Things that Pissed Me the Fuck Off in 2010 .  .  .

Famous Ass Homewreaking Whores

We all know, as a confessed former Side Chick, I can’t really talk about folks that cheat, except, I’m finna.  Alicia Keys, Gabrielle Union, Fantasia Barrino, That Bish John Edward’s got pregnant, that tattooed Nazi Bish that was Humping on Jesse James, all of Tiger Wood’s Heauxs . . . CLEARLY this list is never ending.  2010 was the year of the Side Chick Come Up.  Folks getting TV Shows, and book deals, all because they had the wherewithall to suck a dcik. Never in my 28 years would I have thought that I would see the day when being a lying, cheating, whore would be something that made other people famous.

Alicia Keys got a beaknosed baby and a Gonzo-Looking husband out of the deal.  Gabby Union gets to go to basketball games for free. The Tattooed Nazi Bish got all kinda of magazine ad’s and free publicity for her website, Tiger’s Woods main heaux is currently on Celebrity Rehab for Love Addition. {Pause: What the FUCK is Love Addiction? How is that even a disease that needs to be cured? I love you Dr. Drew, but really?} Sadly, all Fantasia got was an ugly ass Nupe, 4 Grammy nominations, and her show getting cancelled.  At least she got proven in court to not “really” be a homewreaker. Didn’t really see that blasted all over the news though, did you? Speaking of which . . .

The Racist Ass Media

I already have issues with the media because I’m not a part of it.  But 2010 was SURELY the year of biased ass news coverage regarding the plight of the famous.  The first clue for me that the media was horribly racist was the converage of the Tiger Woods Debacle.  Yes, it started in 2009, but it just kept getting bigger and bigger.  He wasn’t the first sports figure to be a whore while he was married, but he was the first Black Man who got caught by his white wife cuz he was humping white girls all over the country.

The vilification of Michael Vick, even after he served his time in prison, is another example. Tucker “Closested Bigot” Carlson said he should be executed for his crimes? For making dogs fight each other.  MuthaFucka for real? For killing Dogs? He got more time in jail for killing dogs than Ben Roethlesberger got interviewed for being accused of rape.

Fox News and their coverage of President Obama is another GLARING example of how racism is becoming the back bone of all kinds of media coverage. The fact that he is almost never referred to as President Obama, but instead of as Barack or just Obama is so damn disrespectful! It’s not just Fox News that does it, other media outlets do as well.  

They always talk about the things he hasn’t gotten done, but never discuss what he HAS gotten accomplished.  If you would like to know what he’s done so far click here —> http://bit.ly/eN4058 <—— I could rant for daaaaaaaays about this, but then I wouldn’t have to talk about how the Media and the Law refuses to leave Kwame the FCUK alone . . . .

LEAVE KWAME THE FCUK ALONE

The man had a party that was his ultimate downfall.  Every TRUE Detroiter knows someone who was actually at the party. Half the gotdamn city was there.  Yes, Carlita punched some heaux in the face for giving her man a lapdance.  Yes, Kwame did some shady stuff while he was in office.  Yes, his father is a douchebag. Yes, he should pay back the city for the money they spent to cover up his lie.  But must we really spend our entire life, Kym “Pissed cuz Kwame didn’t want me” Worthy, to bring the man down.  He really can’t get no lower.  What’s the point now? I mean really, he doesn’t have any more money to give, he will never be able to run for office anywhere? Are we trying to take the man’s dignity and will to live at this point? Note: If he really did get that girl killed, he deserves to sit in prison for the rest of his life. But I’m so damn tired of hearing about how horrible a person Kwame is!

Famous Black Men continuing to Fcuk Up

Seriously, I mean SERIOUSLY. Between T.I and Chris Brown, light skinned men don’t got no role models right now.  You spent an entire year redeeming yourself from some admittedly fcuked up mistakes on your part, only to stick your foot in your mouth less than a  year later.

T.I: SIR. Really, dental work turned you into a drug addict? Why did you get your teeth fixed in the first damn place? Your fans don’t give a hell you had chicklet teeth.  We thought it was cute. But your teeth were hurting so you had 50 Ecstasy pills and weed in your Maybach. Because that makes sense . . . It does. When you get out of jail this time, just sit your Beige ass down somewhere.

Chris Brown: You know I love you.  I STAN for you. I have written several blogs regarding my love for you, but if you don’t get your light skinned dancing ass off Twitter, you are never going to be able to make a record people pay for again.  Yes, I know that RazBerry was baiting you and he was being a douche, but you NEVER NEVER NEVER get back at an asshole by talking about their claims of rape or molestation.  

You beat up RiRi Five Head, we saw the pictures.  He was trying to get people to pay attention to him, becuase the 4 youtube plays didn’t work. You played right into his hands.  Now the Racist Ass Media has you looking like a Homophobe. I will admit though, calling him a Peter Pan Dcik in the Booty Azz Boy was HIGHLARIOUS. Get rid of your twitter Hunny, I love you too much to see you fail.

Kanye: Shut the Fcuk Up. Don’t talk, ever on TV. Ever. Just make beats and albums, and SHUT THE FCUK UP.

Republicans

Not all Republicans are evil, but the majority of them are dumb as hell.  Their view of the world is so skewed it’s like when they talk they see a different place.  The growing popularity of the Tea Party Movement and their racist propaganda {that is largely ignored by the mainsteam media} scares the shit outta me. The fact that Sarah “I can see Russia from my House” Palin has a fighting chance at being a candidate for President in 2012 just makes me want to scream.

Sadly, the thing that I find the most frustrating is also something I think Black Folks and Democrats could learn from.  Their singular focus on meeting whatever goal it is they have has turned a Moment of Change into a Whimper of Hope. They have made this country miserable for 10 years, and it ain’t lookin’ too good for getting better anytime soon.

John Edwards

Dear John Edwards, Fcuk You. You seem to be the epitome of having no couth in 2010. Not only did you cheat on your wife while she was dying of Cancer, but before she died or you had gotten a divorce, you were planning your new life with the bish you knocked up? I mean really, picking out wedding venues? Were you planing on paying for the event with the life insurance from the policy you had on Elizabeth? The only thing that makes me smile is know that you will NEVER be able to run for a public office, because women across the country hate your stinking GUTS. With Utter Disdain, Me.

SubPar Singers

Yes, I’m talking to you Ciara, Keyshia, Rihanna, and Keri. I feel like, maybe if you guys formed a super group of half nekkid dancing bishes you might get more album sales.  You can let Soulja Boi rap on half the songs, and help his stupid ass out too.

Keyshia: I know your life was hard, but you have GOT to stop singing like your screech is gonna take you to the promise land.  You need to get back to the Keyshia Cole that TuPac told people was going to be a famous singer at 9. Stop trying to be like everyone else, and be yourself. Also, stop with the Tattoos, it’s not now nor will it ever be cute.

Ciara: We know you can dance, we get it. We also know you have a STRONG ass jaw.  This doesn’t help the fact that you couldn’t sing on key if your life depended on it.  I just really need you to get a vocal couch and just BREATHE. Also, please do me a favor and tell Kim K to stick to helping black men win championships with her vajayjay. No one wants to hear her sing . . . NO ONE.

Keri: Go back to writing songs.

Rihanna: I JUST figured out that you were from an island.  You should go back there, and like un-learn the RiRi Five Head Yodel.  This is not to say that you don’t have some catchy ass songs.  I have about 10 of your songs on my phone right now {Oh Na Na . . .hWhat’s My Name}. But you need to do better. Also, just because your BFF is Katy Perry, it doesn’t mean you can have Red Hair. It’s not okay.

Stupid People on Twitter

Lastly, let’s discuss the stupid people on twitter.  It’s not just random people I don’t know, it’s also famous people who say the most ignorant shit.  I have lost respect for so many people just based on the things they tweet.  #SelvesofSteam {Self esteem} #DefenseMagnesium {Defense Mechanism} #LactoseandTolerants {Lactose Intolerant}. That is just the tip of the Iceburg.  This year has truly shown me how important my education is to me, and how far we have to go as a people regarding common damn sense.  For a full overview of the 25 Dumbest Tweets of 2010 click here —-> http://bit.ly/fQuVPj <—–

There is more from 2010 that I could comment on, and I may come back and add to this.  But right now, it’s also 7 in the AM, and this is all I care to discuss.  Feel free to share things that bothered you this year too!

Happy New Year Guys!

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2 thoughts on “Have You No Couth?!?!? – Things that Pissed Me the F*ck Off in 2010

  1. U really should prepare people before you let us read. I nearly ruined my computer with the drink I spit out while laughing.

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