Tag Archive | Common

Confessions of a Single Black Female Vol 7: Why I Love Black Men


You can NOT deny this man’s Swag!

If you knew me in college, this title has already thrown you off. Because you probably remember the day I skipped all my classes my Sophomore Year to sit in Kennedy Union to stick up for my statement, “There is a 30% chance that I will marry a Black Man. They aren’t even what I’m attracted to.” Yes, I made that statement. I meant that shit. That statement made it to all the black people on my Predominately White Campus is less than an hour. Keep in Mind, this was the year 2000 . . . No Twitter, no Facebook, no MySpace, just phones and text messaging. I was in KU for about 5 hours, and the discussion was intense! I lost the respect of a few people that day, and I don’t know If i ever got it back. Nine years later*, what has changed?

Luke Cage

Captain Save This Heaux 

My environment. I was raised around the Pale People, went to school with them, shopped in their areas, pretty much spent my time with them. So you like what you KNOW. Yeah, our house was in Detroit until I was 14, but I didn’t do anything at my house. The only people I played with on my street were family, literally. So when college was over, after The One that Got Away broke my lil heart, I exposed myself to more black folks, in the hopes of finding his replacement. Don’t Judge, you’ve done it too. So now, my Ode to the Black Men I Know, Love, and Appreciate. (This might not be for those under the age of 18, Thought I would put that out there)
Taye Diggs

We’ve since learned this man is an idiot … But that Smile is still legendary.

Confession #29: White Teeth + Black Man’s Smile = Heaven On Earth
There is a reason Taye Diggs is one of the most popular black actors, and was cast in like every other movie in the later 90’s and early 00’s. It’s not his superb acting ability. It’s the scene in “How Stella Got Her Groove Back” when he’s walking around the corner, and see’s Stella, and had that beautiful smile on his face. Lord Jesus, I just lightweight shivered thinking about it. 

A well kept black man’s mouth makes you want to just grab his face and thoroughly investigate the nooks and crannies . . . with your tongue. Or is that just me? Did I go too far? Does it matter, this is my note. I can say what I want. White Teeth set me off . . . they do! Also, men, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE keep your facial hair tight. If you have discovered you get more attention with facial hair, don’t shave it off. Because the same women who liked you with facial hair, don’t like looking at you now. It’s weird. The proper Goatee/chin strap/Beard can get the BUSINESS. Have Beautiful Teeth too . . . .OVER!


Whew Jesus This Man is Fine!


Confession #30: A Bald Head on a Black Man Begs to be Grabbed
That visual you just got . . . Yeah Buddy! Something about a bald head on a black man. Especially a dark Skinned Black Man, whew! Just smooth and round and pretty. Let me focus before I make some phone calls. There is a draw back to this one ladies. Those men that have Bumpy Lumpy Weird Shaped heads. Know your strengths men, honestly. Every man doesn’t look good with a bald head. Take Ne-Yo for example. If that negro had taken that hat off one more time on the Coon Awards, I would have had to vomit. That isn’t sexy, put your M’Fin hat back on boy! That is why you wear them. But know that, when the right man has the RIGHT shaped head, and keeps it looking right and not scruffy . . . GRRRRRRRRRRR!
jesse williams

Classy Woke Bae

Confession #31: Ain’t Nothin’ Better than a Black Man in a Suit
I was in the airport on my way back to the Black Man’s Barren Wasteland that is Tucson Arizona, and I almost got beat up in the airport. In front of me in line was the most beautiful black man I had ever seen. He must have been on his way to or from a meeting. It’s 9 in the morning, he had on a 3-piece, Italian Cut, Black with Gray Pinstripes suit. And on his feet, the non-ghetto Stacy Adams, yes I do know mens shoes. The Lady Behind me was Arabic, and I heard her say, GOT Damn! I turned around and said, I AGREE! Living out here, you don’t see that much, but that mental picture stays with me. A Black man in a Suit is kryptonite for me. He could be ugly as hell, but that suit, if it fits right, might give him a pass . . .
Confession #32: Ain’t Nothing Sexier than Sex with a Black Man
Not the 26 year old Virgin is making a statement! But Y”ll know it’s true. Not just because they come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, but their level of concentration (in the Important moments) is infinite. It’s really not fair that I say this, due to the fact that I haven’t had sex with people other than Black Men, but still. {Seven Years after writing this, and having . . . expanded my horizons racially, this is indeed FACT.}
I have fooled around with a Rainbow Coalition of Men, and the difference is PALPABLE. It just is. I’m going to end this one just like that, because I do have Family on FB . . .

The AUTONOMOUS Alpha Beta Mu Chapter of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity, Inc. 

Confession #33: Black Greek Men are in a World of their Own
My Girls already know, and I am willing to admit. I have never talked to a Black Man who wasn’t Greek. No, I’m not a groupie (unless they are Que, then the jury is still out) but It’s just something about a Black Greek Man who knows how to handle his business. He has his priorities in order, knows what his goals are, and then pursues it. Not all Black Greek Men are like this, but the ones that I find attractive are. I will admit, I was sucked into the Matrix on this one. Two dudes, same qualifications and looks. If one is Greek, I will choose him, and often times not even know he’s Greek. It comes up later.


Without Fail, every Black man I have been attracted to*, Stalked, or Tried to Holla at was Greek. Even more sad, I can usually look at a group of Black Men and tell you what Org they belong to. I have only been wrong once, and that wasn’t my fault. When have YOU ever seen a Kappa with Dreads down to his ass???!!!???? Considering I didn’t start “dating” Until I turned 18, and I was already a Zeta by then, I guess I was going for what I knew. Yes, there are beautiful black men who aren’t Greek (Crank that Barack Obama) but the Greek World is small, and since dudes use it as a dating pool, why shouldn’t we?


Idris Elba

Let me Steal Your Soul

This Note turned out differently than I thought it was going to, LOL. There are more reasons that I love the Black Man, but evidently I had to explain why I am Attracted to them. Yes, the reasons I have listed might seem superficial, but if they don’t meet these requirements, they won’t ever get to the Getting to Know You Phase, where the benchmarks are much more stringent. Just like men tell women all the time, you are nice just not my type . . . I know my type. I LOVE my Type. I’ve noticed that the past often dictates the future. You find one person that ISN’T your type, and they treat you right, they become your type. You are always going to look for someone who reminds you of that person, whether you know it or not.

*I wrote this 7 years ago, and I was in a CRAZY place in my life.  I’m really glad to know, my views on black men haven’t changed.  They’ve actually just become more beautiful in my eyes.  That Que statement . . . I had a Groupie Phase, not even gonna lie.